Questions to Ask an Online Date – What You Need to Know About Them

Posted on December 8, 2017 in Uncategorized

Are you fond of joining online dating sites? Are you currently dating someone online now? Are you in the getting-to-know-you stage? Then you better start your devising the questions to ask an online date. You have to prepare in paper what essential things to find out from the other person.

There are many people especially those busy ones that are joining online dating sites to find men and women to get along with. Since they are busy with work, they don’t have the luxury to go out, party and meet new people. Therefore, they join dating sites to find someone they can get along with and date online. Eventually, if things work out fine, this can lead to a real date.

But, before anything else it is important to get to know well that person on the other side of the computer. Ask him questions that will give you an idea of what kind of person he is so you will find out if both of you are compatible with each other. If you do not ask questions then you will never know what kind of person he is and you might be surprised when you two will finally meet on a real date. Below are some sample questions to ask an online date by stages.

Stage #1: Autobiography Questions

This is the getting-to-know-you zone. Ask them the basic questions about themselves such as their name, age, address, status, job, etc. These are very basic questions that people ask each other on the first meeting. Discuss your fields of work and see if you have any similarities that will make you compatible in your line of job. If you don’t have any, you can ask him/her more and you will definitely learn something out of that conversation.

Stage #2: Likes and Dislikes

These questions to ask an online date come out when you are both in the stage where you are developing friendship. These questions are always important so you will know how to deal with the person. The most basic questions to ask an online date are: “what do you like to on your spare time?” or “what’s your favorite and not least liked food?” and many other questions. You will also need to ask the person particular questions like, “what do you hate in a man/woman?” or “what do you like in a man/woman?”

Stage #3: Goals

This is the stage where you are showing interest with each other and loving relationship is about to develop. It is never wrong to ask if the person has goals in life. Remember that you are dating and you therefore agree to present yourselves in a manner that you will get to know more of each other. If the person has goals in life then it is good because he has plans for the future. If he doesn’t have any then he is probably not ready for anything yet but he might formulate some along the way. Goals are always important because it is one motivation that will make a person work hard for what he wants to happen or have in the future.

Stage #4: Personal Questions

These questions to ask an online date should come last. This should be asked when both of you are already knowledgeable about each other and you are going deeper in your relationship. Personal questions would involve the type of life he/she has been living with his/her family and friends. These questions may also be asked when both of you meet personally for a date but it can also be asked while you are getting serious in your online dating.

Major Online Dating Sites

Posted on December 4, 2017 in Uncategorized

What makes certain online dating sites better than the others? There are many dating websites out there yet as with many things, there are always the most popular ones. What makes the major online dating sites so popular? Some of these top ones include Koopa.com, OKCupid.com, PlentyofFish.com (Pof), and CasualKiss.com.

Well, one of the main reasons is that they are free. They don’t charge a fee for you to sign up and start finding people you want to get to know. Like the others, many of them help match you up with people who have the same interests, goals, likes, and dislikes. But the major online dating sites also allow you to find people who may not be recommended by the sites. Crazy as it seems, many sites match your profile to other profiles but you can’t customize your search and pair yourself up on your own. But the major Internet dating sites that are so popular allow you this flexibility and option. In other words, you aren’t limited.

Community is a huge factor in the success of top free online dating sites. Koopa offers a great community. Sense of community is also known as a psychological sense of community and users want to belong to a group where they feel a strong part of. Community allows them to be free to be themselves as well as be amongst others who can have that same freedom and be appreciated for who they are. Community is about acceptance and feeling like being in a big (or small) family. The group, or community, that you belong to is all dependent on you. And the top sites allow this.

Koopa is excellent in not limiting their users and visitors. The Koopa community allows you to be as social as you wish. You can use the free site strictly for online dating, for finding new and old friends, and for networking and finding business collaborations. Whether you upload photos and content to find your perfect match for dating or for business ventures and goals, that is up to you. You can create posts, questions, and content to assist you in your online dating and social networking with Koopa.

Plenty of Fish, or Pof, gives online dating site users a chemistry test to take. Their goal is to help registered users discover and list their emotional needs in order to develop long term, fulfilling relationships as their emotional needs will be met. Pof also helps you to discover your relationship needs. Many relationship sites don’t offer this.

OkCupid, like Koopa, allows for a mix. You can stir up your online dating and social networking. The unique thing about OkCupid is that you can be matched or NOT matched to anyone even if they are considered to be your Friend, Partner, or Enemy. Yes, you can even choose to be matched to your Enemy.

So there you have a few reasons why the major online dating sites are better than the thousands of free dating websites out there.

[Top]

Should You Lie In Your Online Dating Profile? Maybe

Posted on November 30, 2017 in Uncategorized

I ran across a post on an online dating site, the other day, entitled “Why You Should Lie In Your Online Dating Profile.” No kidding. In the interests of full credit for work done, Russ Ruggles is the author. Google it and you can find his post. Proving once again if you look hard enough, you can find just about anything online, irrespective of merit. No, Russ is not talking about the whopping misrepresentations that plagued online dating in the early years. Those of you around “back then,” know what I mean. He’s talking about itty-bitty fibs targeted at expanding exposure…about gaming the search engine on the site, by stretching or shrinking the truth. Two examples used in his post were women under-reporting their weight or men adding an inch to their height to improve their search results in the interests of upping the number of prospects.

Russ doesn’t stop there. He blends social science into his argument; using two studies specific to online dating. The first was the small sample (163) study conducted by Eastwick and Finkel at Northwestern University and the second the much more ambitious 2008 Michigan State University Study of Toma, Hancock and Ellison, entitled, “Separating Fact From Fiction: An Examination of Deceptive Self-Presentation in Online Dating Profiles”…though he attributes it to Ellison only. One of their findings in the latter indicate that 90% of respondents copped to deceptive self-representation in their profiles… but only, Ruggles notes, in matters unlikely to be noticed on meeting. All of which makes it okay, right? I don’t want to sound stiff-necked, but it makes me squirm when someone (male or female) advocates conscious misrepresentation. I’ll concede it happens. I’ve been on the business end of “creative” self-representation in online dating. I’ll even cop to being tolerant of the kinds of minor infractions he refers to, if “she” was otherwise attractive to me personally. And, in Mr. Ruggles defense; the social honesty bar isn’t very high, when we have web sites devoted almost exclusively to fact-checking the statements of our elected officials. The inescapable conclusion is we EXPECT to be lied to. Or should we call it “marketing…or spin?” So lying on your profile… particularly little lies… are no big deal, right?

Sorry, Russ. Can’t see it that way… for (at least) these three reasons.

1. We become the decisions we make. If you choose to lie in small things, you’re prone to developing the insidious habit of doing so whenever it’s convenient. Will it inevitably lead to bigger lies? Maybe not. But if we can agree we are over-supplied with examples of whoppers told for personal gain in business and politics, aren’t we justified in concluding there may be something to the ole slippery slope analogy?

2. Lies are the necessary accomplices of greater offenses. What Enron, Bernie Madoff, the Arco debacle and the ill-conceived war in Iraq all have in common is their foundation in lies. They rely on deception to attract support or money. While the stakes in online dating seem inconsequential by comparison, someone who consents to meet you invests the time it takes to determine whether you might be a fit. Yes, that’s part of the understood cost of online dating, but don’t we owe each other “truth in advertising” out of respect for each other’s time… because none of us will ever get that time back.

3. There’s a better way. Interestingly enough, on a different site on the same day, a poster identified only as Liz made the counter point beautifully, when called both herself and online dating sisters out for their stubborn adherence to rigid and restrictive “requirements.” She had recently concluded her own laundry list had little or nothing to do with what she actually found attractive in men. As a man, I can second her opinion and tell you I have often opted for something other than my hypothetical ideal when confronted with a profile that fell outside those preconceived notions. The key, Liz correctly observes, is flexibility on our parts, with regard to those stated requirements; not creative treatment of the truth.

Someone reading this right now is whispering, “Yeah right. You’re dreaming! How many are REALLY willing to compromise on their expectations and accept me as I am?” It’s a fair question. But if we’re honest, the answer is MOST of us are. How many of us… men or women… wind up with the “ideal” man or woman paraded in front of us by mainstream media? How many men of your personal acquaintance are married to super models? How many women do you know with truly narrow gauge “heavy hitters” for their main squeeze? Unless you’re pretty narrow gauge yourself, the answer is not many!

But most importantly…what does it mean if you or I buy into the argument in Russ Ruggles’ post? That it’s okay to stretch the truth? That if everyone else is doing it, we have to as well, in order to compete? Or might it mean that, deep down we don’t think we’re worthy just as we are? I can’t answer for Russ Ruggles… or for you. But you must answer for yourself, as must all of us. In the end, we are the stewards of the image others form of us and above all of ourselves and how we feel about us. No one will ever feel better about us than we do. Yes, Virginia and Virgil… you are whom you attract! If that bothers you, work on fixing your reality… not the appearance of it!

[Top]